Smoothing over her dirty apron, she wipes the tears from her cheeks. She walks over to the counter to ensure everything is in place. The creamer is in the refrigerator, the shakers are on the drying rack, and everything is set, except for Hana. After a few months in a new country, she feels immense pressure. They all speak another language. Even after five months, English is still as foreign as it was when she touched down in New York. She can’t seem to express her feelings in words others will understand. Frustration feels heavy on her shoulders, like boulders stacked upon her chest.

Immigration is a tumultuous journey, and for Hana, the language barrier keeps her from her potential. At work, she struggles to express herself and is ashamed of her failures. There are many difficulties with language proficiency, “…almost half of immigrants in the U.S. are not English proficient,” according to the George W. Bush Institute.

However, after those initial months of wrestling with a foreign tongue, Hana reflects on how she has grown. Now she recognizes her resiliency when adapting to a new language and life. “Everything was new and foreign,” she says. “They were out of character for me and that was who I was trying to be, less me,” Hana explains the importance of breaking out of her shell as she progresses through immigration.

She experiences culture shock not only with language but with other cultural differences. Culture shock is frequently a phase individuals face after finding differences between the environment they grew up in, and the one they transitioned to. In Japan, Hana would’ve never concerned herself with random strangers. Communities in America are supportive and inviting which is new to Hana since she comes from Japan where judgment toward others is normalized. Hana is overwhelmed when exposed to the sense of community she finds in New York City subway riders.

The subway is steamy, and beads of sweat roll down the back of Hana’s tank top, seeping into her shorts. Everyone stands waiting for the train, some with paper fans, others with bottles of what was once cool water resting on their foreheads.

The train rolls in after the longest six minutes of Hana’s life and she steps in to find herself in yet another sweltering hell. The subway car has no air conditioning. People cuss under their breath and rock back and forth in frustration as the train roars into motion. The distant cries of a baby fill the train car. How hot it must be outside, especially for a child, she wondered.

The train car stops, and Hana anticipates a long delay as she finds herself stuck next to other sticky passengers. The cries of the baby echo through the dense, warm air. People shove, moving from one side of the car to the other, walking toward the crying child and their young parents.

To her surprise, people offer their help. Hana watches in amazement as strangers gather to slide doors open in hopes of letting in a breeze. She felt a sense of community with these sticky strangers. Never had she seen people come together like this. At first, they seemed to be doing themselves a favor, silencing the child. Instead, Hana realizes the concern everyone shared. A new feeling of belonging settles, as the sense of community begins to extend an arm to her.

Although Hana begins to settle into a rhythm in America, there are phases of highs and lows many immigrants experience. Hana reaches her point of “Adjustment” after the “Honeymoon” phase, which commonly occurs when newcomers have high hopes. For Hana she wanted to have a prosperous job so she could be successful and proud. Many immigrants start with excitement when first entering a new country but will eventually come down to the “Adjustment” phase. This is a time when they will understand the harsh realities of trying to be accepted into a new society.

Hana shuffles through her resumés. It’s all familiar to her, scrambling to find a job worthy of her skills. The phone rings and Hana carefully articulates what she is looking for. She talks slowly and calmly, trying not to give a desperate impression or to give away her reluctance to speak English proudly. Only months into familiarizing herself with the sound of R’s and words ending in -ing, her discomfort is obvious when she speaks. The woman on the phone isn’t sure how to respond, so she leaves Hana with words of encouragement as they cannot offer her a job.

Tears begin to blur the sight of Hana cradling her paperwork. Teardrops stain her pile of freshly printed resumés, making the paper wrinkle and tear. It wouldn’t always be this hard, but this was the usual for Hana, being denied jobs left and right.

“Some things have been issues for me,” Hana says. “I had to find another opening to pull myself through,” she says when asked about how she perseveres through obstacles. Hana had been working small part-time jobs that gave her no fulfillment in Japan, so she hoped in America to find better opportunities. Quickly she realized this wasn’t exactly the case.

Many immigrants from Japan are young and hungry for a future with opportunity. According to The Fostering Network, empowerment, liberation, achievement, development, and satisfaction are present in young immigrants. Whether it be navigating new jobs, and friends, gaining freedom, or escaping the constraints of a strict society, experiencing these reassuring feelings is exactly what people like Hana need. It’s difficult to start fresh but usually, these are the traits of those who will succeed in a new environment.

The reflection in the mirror is refreshing. As Hana stands with her midriff subtly peeking out, she reaches for her scratched black glasses. She tries to fit them onto her flat nose. Crouching by the window looking out on Manhattan, a bustling energy surges through New York City, she is no longer in Japan.

In America, she resorts to a more refined version of herself. She opts for contacts to go along with her overgrown bangs and fresh ear piercings. Her cropped shirt and baggy jeans sit uncomfortably on her body. She is unrecognizable to anyone back home. Hana finds herself in a foreign outfit, a mere facade, an attempt at fitting in.

The experience of redefining who you are and who you want to be can be an overwhelming obstacle after reaching a new city. Though the Carnegie Corporation recognizes that immigrants are integrating into American society as quickly as they ever have, Hana is gaining a sense of who she will become as she embarks on this journey, though she has bigger changes coming her way.

When asked about her advice to another person trying to immigrate to America, she spoke fondly about her experiences trying new things. “I know I was scared and I had a lot of help, but I made a plan and tried it,” she says. “Sometimes the most scary things, you can learn the most from,” she continues. “It’s easiest to try it.”

The American house party is a guilty pleasure for Hana. She struggles through the door and she finds a sea of teenagers in provocative clothing with bass-thumping music, and underage drinking from red plastic cups. She may be twenty-three but she feels shy like a three-year-old on their first day of school.

Hana’s eyes hurriedly scan the room for a “familiar face,” but everyone is off talking with red cups filled with drinks in their hands. The sound of plastic hitting the triangular configuration of cups ahead of her catches her attention. Though she doesn’t know how to play, Hana curiously makes her way through. Without saying much, everyone takes a shot of “unidentifiable alcohol,” and along with her new “teammates,” she plays Beer Pong.

The excitement grows, and more shots are taken out of red cups as a crowd gathers around the table. Hana’s confidence grows as more ping pong balls are lost under furniture and a spectating crowd begins to chant. “Hana, Hana, Hana…” They chant in unison with red cups in the air.

The realities of integrating into a new culture are always challenging, however success can be found in the smallest of places. Hana will suffer through many obstacles but among them, she will laugh and indulge with people from different walks of life. It’s important to recognize not every successful immigrant story ends with them being a billionaire entrepreneur, or being stuck in a poor unfulfilled dream. Like Hana, one must find where they fit, where they are accepted, and where they belong, even in the most unsuspecting places.